En Route: Taipei

No plan.

The view after the first leg: SFO

It occurred to me an hour into my flight. Hurtling through the sky swaddled in every layer of clothing I’d packed to ward against the cold I assumed I'd face on the plane, and still somehow inadequately equipped for despite my layers, it occurred to me that I had no plan.

I arranged this flight less than 12 hours before its scheduled departure, packed eight hours later, and at no point had I even paid attention to anything beyond the likelihood I’d make my connection in SFO.

So accustomed to the generosity of my cousin’s flight pass and my own whimsy, to eating the cookies while I bake them, it has only just now, 30,000 feet above the rest of the world, occurred to me that I don’t know where I'll stay in Taipei, or even how long I'll be there. A friend of a friend gave me suggestions, scrolling screens of foods and neighborhoods, national parks and lesser known cities, but aside from a list of tings I could do I have no real ideas about what I will do.

That realization doesn’t terrify me even as I feel a certain recklessness in it. Reckless not because I haven’t shown up to a place with no plan, this last year has mostly involved plan-less journeys into countries I've never visited, but reckless in some way I sense but cannot name.

Maybe it is the near routine of the last year, my new normal of not knowing what my days will look like. Maybe it is me settling into the liminal space between my chosen uncertainty that awaits me once 2019 counts itself into a new decade and my search for employment kicks into a more urgent gear.

Whatever the reason or rationale, the reality is me sitting in a freezing airplane cabin, blessed with three seats to myself to stretch out on and no idea where I might stay or how bustling Taipei will be at almost 9pm when I will be cleared through customs and released into a foreign city.

I haven’t even looked at pictures.

I imagine Taipei looks like Tokyo, a city I appreciate for its ease and abundance but dislike for its constant demands for my attention. Smaller, but as frenetic and thronged – and as safe. And if it is nothing like that? If it is nothing like that I will manage. I will manage and meld myself into whatever curves or angles the city offers and follow a path, or forge my own, for this final adventure of my year of living freely.